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lay of the landfill

from cold and distant, not loving by kerouac

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this place is a landfill, spilling endless tongues, mouths that sting and spit empty threats. I know this isn’t how you saw your life; 19 and drowning in chemicals. when you say “I’m beautiful and I’m creative” I see behind those eyes and all I see is shame and lies. “o’ I am beautiful and I am creative” and your belief, it makes me shiver. you say you’re free but you’re stuck in a vice, scratching an itch from night to night. you say you’re free because it’s the only way that you can feel alive. and I’ll smile as I tell you so. I’ll be there at the end, when your dreams come falling down, and you will shiver.

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from cold and distant, not loving, released December 13, 2010

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